Unanswered Prayers

God's plan is bigger then my plan.

God's grace is bigger then my mistakes.

God's love is bigger then my comprehension.

These past few months I have been understanding deeper that my picture is part of a bigger picture. My life is not my own. My thoughts are not my thoughts. His ways are bigger and better than even my best. So for that reason alone, I am thankful and blessed for unanswered prayers. I'm so thankful that I don't plan my future on what I think is best. My favorite prayer is thanking God for allowing His plan to supersede my foolish thoughts of what I need. He knows my heart. He knows my whole heart better then I even I do..

So often with unanswered prayers I learn more of God's love for me then when I receive what I think I want. I don't know what is best for me. That is what I learn daily. That I must die to my desires, DAILY, to understand God's unwavering love.

Though it is hard to admit my prayers are so often for my selfish desires. I so often find myself praying for things that would bring me what I want, rather then what God wants. I know that God only wants the best for me, so why do I tend to think that if I pray with self-seeking motives I will get what I desire?

This is a learning process for me and I'm thankful that Jesus doesn't look at me any differently. He loves me the same. He gave Himself for me, I'm gearing my praying to what HE wants from my life. Not what I want.

reFlectIon

I guess I am coming to an age where I can look back at my past and see how it has impacted my future. How my yesterdays have impacted my tomorrows. How my tomorrows will soon become my future. I can look back and see all the little pieces you have made work together for my good. And appreciate them, even the ones that I did not appreciate at the time. I can see all the little pieces that have formed me. I can see how they fell into place, how by God's grace even the ugly pieces have been made beautiful. I can see how He has the bigger picture. I have the smaller pieces and I want to limit my picture. I want a little picture, but my God has a big, beautiful, amazing, breathtaking picture. I love having His will, and picture revealed to me. Today I sit in amazement at how my picture has fallen. How my pieces have fallen so strategically and not by chance or ironically, but by My God's perfect hand.

Thank you Lord for having the bigger picture and not listening to my begging calls to fix the little pieces.

Thank you for not listening to me. I don't know what to wear in the morning let alone what is best for myself. Though I claim to know what I need, I don't. Thank you for knowing my every single little need and fulfilling.

Lord, you are so sovereign and merciful. Thank you.

Your love never fails, and I need You.

Had to Share

Are you a trader?

Are you normal? Or are you weird?

Jehovah Jireh- God our Provider

This past week I've been sick and at times super weak, every time I'd go to write this post it would never turn out like I hoped, so here I go. Hopefully this reveals something to you, if nothing else it has really ministered to me.

My goal for this blog, sense the very beginning, has been transparency. I don’t have everything together. I’m messed-up and screwed up. Yes I’m a Christian, I passionately seek the Lord, I run after Him daily, but I’m not perfect. It’s not easy to admit, but through reading this passage the Lord revealed to me how faithless I can be, how sometimes I can laugh at His promises, and yes, even doubt His mightiness.

Reading through the story of Abraham and Sarah I saw how the Lord is a miracle worker. Even when we don’t deserve it, He works miracles and provides us with the desires in our heart. Even when we laugh in His face promising us something that seems impossible, He provides.

These are verses from Genesis 11-17

The LORD had said to Abram, “Go from your country, your people and your father’s household to the land I will show you. “I will make you into a great nation, and I will bless you; I will make your name great, and you will be a blessing."

Now Sarai, Abram’s wife, had borne him no children. But she had an Egyptian slave named Hagar; so she said to Abram, “The LORD has kept me from having children. Go, sleep with my slave; perhaps I can build a family through her.”

Abram agreed to what Sarai said. So after Abram had been living in Canaan ten years, Sarai his wife took her Egyptian slave Hagar and gave her to her husband to be his wife. He slept with Hagar, and she conceived.

When she knew she was pregnant, she began to despise her mistress. Then Sarai said to Abram, “You are responsible for the wrong I am suffering. I put my slave in your arms, and now that she knows she is pregnant, she despises me. May the LORD judge between you and me.”

God also said to Abraham, “As for Sarai your wife, you are no longer to call her Sarai; her name will be Sarah. I will bless her and will surely give you a son by her. I will bless her so that she will be the mother of nations; kings of peoples will come from her.”

Abraham fell facedown; he laughed and said to himself, “Will a son be born to a man a hundred years old? Will Sarah bear a child at the age of ninety?” And Abraham said to God, “If only Ishmael might live under your blessing!”

Then God said, “Yes, but your wife Sarah will bear you a son, and you will call him Isaac. I will establish my covenant with him as an everlasting covenant for his descendants after him. And as for Ishmael, I have heard you: I will surely bless him; I will make him fruitful and will greatly increase his numbers. He will be the father of twelve rulers, and I will make him into a great nation. But my covenant I will establish with Isaac, whom Sarah will bear to you by this time next year.” When he had finished speaking with Abraham, God went up from him.

So basically whenever I use to read this passage I would think. Wow, that’s great that the Lord did that. How great that Sarah would have a kid. Wow cool God. And that is where I would stop and move on to Genesis 18. But, when I truly stopped and read it, and appreciated it, I realized, God just provided the IMPOSSIBLE! Sarah's pregnancy was truly miraculous; she had been trying to get pregnant for so many years without success, but when she put her faith in God's word, the impossible became possible. In the physical her case looked hopeless, but little did she know that God was preparing her for an exceptional miracle.

Sarah and Abraham (a great follow of God) laughed about God’s faithfulness, yet God provided. Abraham being the man of God that he was, doubted God for all that He promised. This spoke to me, because God could reveal and provide us with so stinkin much but we have a tendency to put God in a little box and expect Him to only provide us with what we need, not what we desire. FALSE! This is so false, it says in the bible, delight in ME (meaning the Lord) and I will give you the desires of your heart, because it is I would created those desires.

God is not human, and has no human characteristic, He is able to do exceeding more than we can imagine. But, like Sarah, we don’t really expect God to work crazy miraculous things through us.

Like Sarah, we limit God’s abilities, and when He reveals something amazing to us, we laugh and doubt that He can provide such a thing. FAULT. One of God’s many names is Jehovah Jireh- God our Provider. He can provide so much more that we could ever imagine. His plan for our life is better than the best we could ever even imagine it.

So this is my desire. That we let God out of our boxes. That we let Him provide us with more than we need, but what we desire. Key # 1 to do this is, stop limiting God. When He speaks, listen, follow, and surrender. Number 2, never expect less than miraculous. Our God is in the business of miracles, He does only heal, restore, part seas, walk on water, gives sight to the blind, etc. Give Him the power He deserves and He will do exceedingly more than you could ever imagine. Even when it seems impossible!

“If the vision you have for your future isn’t intimidating to you, there is a real good chance it is insulting to God.” –Pastor Steven Furtick

-Be Blessed

this is..

my kinda coffee cup!

prayer

prayer |pre(ə)r|nouna solemn request for help or expression of thanks addressed to God or anobject of worship : I'll say a prayer for him | the peace of God is ours throughprayer.• ( prayers) a religious service, esp. a regular one, at which people gather in order to pray together : 500 people were detained as they attended Friday prayers.• an earnest hope or wish : it is our prayer that the current progress on human rights will be sustained.
Prayer is one of the best ways to connect with God.God of the universe allows us to seek Him, thank Him, praise Him, but most of all just talk with Him. That is the best thing, to think that God holds the whole world in the palm of His hand, yet He is interested in me and you! He has EVERYTHING at his fingertips He has everything of the world but cares for us!God is all knowing and knows every single thing we need, so when we pray, we are crying out to Him, and declaring our dependance on Him. We are essentially saying, "God I give You my problems, my fears, my concerns, because You are stronger. He always hears, and listens to our needs. He answers, yes, no, not now but later, to our prayers. One of my favorite things to pray about is thanking God for answering "no" to some of my prayers. He knows what is best for me, not just what is best, but what is imperative for His will to be done through me, and you. God is not a God of mistakes, or chaos. He knows what He is doing. So when it seems like God is not "answering" it may just be that we are not seeking His plan for us.

“Thus says the Lord who made the earth, the Lord who formed it to establish it—the Lord is his name: Call on me, and I will answer you, and will tell you great and hidden things that you have not known.

—Jeremiah 33:2-3

Psalm 32

The Psalm of David.

The LORD is my shepherd, I lack nothing.

He makes me lie down in green pastures,

He leads me beside quiet waters,

He refreshes my soul.

He guides me along the right paths

for his name’s sake.

Even though I walk

through the darkest valley,

I will fear no evil,

for you are with me;

your rod and staff

they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me

in the presence of my enemies.

You anoint my head with oil,

my cup overflows.

Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life,

and I will dwell in the house of the LORD

forever.

don't settle..

don't settle for bread and butter

when God has prepared a six-course dinner for you!

It seems so easy to settle for bread and butter. Especially when your out to eat with friends and everyone is eating bread and butter. BUT you know that your amazing dinner will be out shortly you just have to be willing to wait. Getting full before your meal won't allow you to truly enjoy it!

This is actually going somewhere. It is just like purity.

God promises us the best. We just have to be willing to wait.

DON'T SETTLE!

This is a huge issue that I struggle with. I have a hard time comprehending that the Lord has planned my life out already. I just have to be willing to trust Him, and in His time He will reveal His perfect plan to me. I have made it a point to not settle anymore! :)

My Savior

Can I get an amen to that! Jesus is my SAVIOR! not my religion. One of the most amazing things about Jesus is He doesn't want my religion. My church is currently doing a series called "Jesus is.." so I will be doing another post on a summary of that, but for now I wanted to share this. Jesus wants my/your relationship. I could speak theological madness for hours on end till I'm blue in the face, but that's not want Jesus seeks and expects.

It says so clearly in the Bible that Jesus wants our heart. This is sometimes difficult for me. I sometimes feel as if I have to memorize bible verses, and study the bible. And by no means, don't get me wrong, those are great things to do! But, Jesus clearly states that on the day of judgement people who believe that they are going to go to heaven will hear Jesus say to them, "depart from me, for I never knew you." Though I'm obviously not Jesus, and I really have no idea, I would speculate that those people, would be those who did not have a relationship with Christ. I would speculate, that those would be people in church who were just going through the motions. Those people who never truly surrendered their life to Christ.

When I saw this picture it reminded me so much of my upbringing in church. I was raised in a church where I felt like Jesus wanted my religion, not my relationship. Because of this I never experienced Jesus. I went to church 17 years and never as much as felt like Jesus was anything tangible or anything real at all.

Through those 17 years there was a void in my life only Jesus could satisfy. Without knowing Him, I searched for Him in all the wrong places. Mostly, in empty relationships. When all those failed I always would wonder why; I would try and complete myself through other people.

When Jesus is the only one who could ever complete me.

So once I met Jesus for the first time I realize that He was real! That He cared about me, He wanted what is best for me, that He loves me. That He wants my relationship, not my religion. He wanted me, not my knowledge about Him. He wants me to seek Him. To love Him. To glorify Him.

God is STILL God, God is STILL good!

Wow, I have been changed from the testimonies of these individuals. God has taken tragedy in their life, and created a way for them to have triumph! God has taken their horrific story and made it beautiful. He has reviled Himself and is still faithful. I aspire to have faith like Erik, Matthew, Zac, and Mandy.

This first story is of Mandy & Zac. Watch in order :)

The Story of Zac Smith from NewSpring Media on Vimeo.

Letter to Zac from NewSpring Media on Vimeo.

A Story | Tears of Hope from NewSpring Media on Vimeo.

Jeremiah 29:11 God promises, "I have great and mighty plans for you, plans for you to proser and not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future.

One thing that I'm always reminded by that verse is if it's not good yet, God's not done!

Through our weakness our faith become's so apparent. Under struggles and persecution God calls us to be leaders in faith and give Him glory. My prayers are with Erik, Matt, and Mandy as God guides them in their walk with Him. I pray that under persecution I can stand for he Lord in such a way as they!

This is the unique relationship of Matt and Erik. God has truly orchestrated this relationship.

A Story | Big Picture Faith from NewSpring Media on Vimeo.

May the Lord continue to work in their lives. Bring healing, provide power on the days that they seem powerless. May their testimonies continue to show the Lord's love.

-xox <3

if you enjoyed this i encourage you to check out this amazing service in it's entirety on NewSpring Churches website. Just click HERE <--- to watch this service!

there's something authentic about brokeness..

Inspiration In a Big Blue Chair from Shade Tree Films on Vimeo.

Romans 8:38-39

Somedays I wake up, and wish that Jesus came to give us peace on earth. You know those days where you wake up and wish the previous day was a dream. That what happened really didn't happen and things were "normal"

Under percussion Jesus trains us to depend on Him. I truly believe that though things on this earth may not make sense and things may seem terrible, I honestly believe that He can give us peace in our hearts. I have been in many different situations where I question what Jesus is doing. I'd be lying if I said that I don't question God. I think that God is okay with our questioning because I know that on the day that we do finally get to see Him face to face He will answer any questions we have.

James 1:2-4

Consider it joy, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.

I have a friend who is undergoing a terrible time in her family. Her sister has relapsed with Leukemia for the 3rd time. I look to this family and question how they have such wonderful faith in the Lord. After the unbelievably hard times they deal with they face everything positively and have full faith in recovery and healing thru the Lord. They are always saying, "God is good"

1 Thessalonians 5:18

give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Jesus Christ

When my great-grandma was diagnosed with cancer I questioned what God was doing. Even before Jesus' death He looked up to heaven and asked if God had forsaken him... And though I did not question long, I did. That is when the Lord put on my heart that our time here is but a vapor, here today and gone tomorrow. Like the season, things come and go. Whatever we are undergoing too shall pass. There is smiling, crying, anger, happiness, sadness, birth, and death.

2 Corinthians 4:16-18

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us and eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen but what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

I truly believe that the Lord can give us rest. He quiets my heart when my mind will not stop. He alone is where I find refuge. He always is the light in the darkness, and I know that He is the one who can fill me up with unconditional love constantly. He is the most constant and unswerving thing in my life. That's why I believe that in good times we should rejoice and be happy. Don't find issues in small things because actual issues will soon arise.

Romans 8:38-39

And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God's love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow- not even the powers of hell can separate us from God's love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below- indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.

god is good

God is so good! yesterday, today, tomorrow!

nothing compares to His love, all else pales in comparison.

forever I will sing of his greatness

because He is the light of my world.

He will always be enough

MY HEART WILL SING, NO OTHER NAME.. JESUS, JESUS!

I wish I could spend everyday in complete worship. At the foot of the cross is where I see all I need and all I could ever want. I belong to the most High and for that reason alone is the reason that I stand for Him. I gave my life to Him because He gave His son to me.

MY HEART WILL SING, NO OTHER NAME.. JESUS, JESUS!

God is good in every circumstance! In the darkest of dark He is still faithful. It is easy to be happy with God when everything goes your way and everything is going well but it is the true test of faith when things are tough, difficult, and unbearable.

JUST A THOUGHT...

well i just wanted to share with you one of my favorite things! being away from home i miss this so much! this was my breakfast literally every single day over the summer after my uncle introduced this wonderful little invention to me. and obviously liking it so much i'm going to tell you all about it! it's made of instant oats (don't let it scare you, i know it seems a little odd, BUT super good I promise :) vanilla, milk, banana, and yogurt. IT'S SO GOOD. and i bet after looking at that picture you would want it too! like i bet if i had some and asked you if you'd want to try it, i guarantee most people would! well you may be wondering why i'm telling you all this. if you think about it, we tell people how much we love our sports teams, how much we love our i-pods, how much we love our friends, etc.. so i decided to post about my favorite breakfast. well kind of, i actually am posting on how we talk about things we love, but why then is it so hard to talk about Jesus?

people question, why some people constantly talk about Jesus? why are they so crazy about Jesus? well just a little secret, cause they LOVE Him. i know, crazy, hun?

i digress; back to my breakfast... just as i told you all about it, and how much i love it. thats how God wants us to tell others about Jesus. he wants us to be able to spread our faith with everyone. he wants us to passionately explain Him to others. once we find Him, we love to share Him.

"the found people like to go find people" WOW! awesome quote. once i truly found Jesus, i went crazy. i was trying to tell every single person on the face of this earth about Him. i wanted everyone to experience His love and just all around amazingness. so this brings forth my first question for "believers"

when did you find Jesus? -if you can't answer this, i'm sorry but, you don't know Jesus. just like all important things in our life we remember dates (your birthday, your anniversary, etc..) we remember exact times. i'm not asking you what the date was when you were confirmed, or when you were baptized as a little baby. i'm asking when you meet Jesus, truly met Jesus. When you first experienced Him, and His unconditional love. You would know if you've met Him because your life would never be the same. So with that said, question number 2..

who have you introduced to Jesus? -like before, when i told you about my favorite breakfast, i like it so much i wanted to share it with you. the same holds true to Jesus. once you meet Him, you want to share Him.

^{Romans 10:14}

¹⁴ How, then, can they call on the one they have not believed in? And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without someone preaching to them?

after i met Jesus i felt completely alone. i felt like Jesus was playing a sick and twisted joke on me. it was almost as if i was told to do the impossible. but as i truly thought about it i began to come to the realization that it was not at all a joke. it was not a mistake! it was not a mistake i was surround by non-believers. its never been so clear to me as it is now. i was the light God gave to my non-believing friends. i was the light in what seemed like an endless darkness. Jesus has taught me what it truly means to tell people about His love. Jesus has truly taught me how to lean on Him, and Him alone. He has shown me what how, "you never know how stronger you can be until you have no other choice than to be strong." He taught me how HE iS ALL i NEED! i am forever thankful.

if you feel like this post or any of my posts make you want to know Jesus as i've explained i'd love to pray for you with you/with you. please comment or get ahold of me!

xoxo

ashley

p.s. happy thanksgiving :)

Lately..

I've been thinking about something I was once told.

Imagine if someone was standing on the edge of this pool and there was someone in the pool hanging on to the edge. If the person in the pool were to grab the person standing on the edge and pull them, it would be much easier for them to pull that person on the edge downward into the pool, than it would be for the person on the edge to pull the person in the pool upward.

This is so true concerning whats right and wrong. It is much easier to fall downward to peer pressure and the ways of the devil than it is for us to stand up and live for the Lord.

I also like to think about how once we give in we are generally stuck. Imagine if that person in the pool were to have the person standing on the edges hand... The person in the pool would have a part of that person already. This would make getting them in the pool much easier. Once you give in on just one aspect it also effects all other aspects as well.

No one said it would be easy but I promise you it will be worth it! Living for the Lord is the best and most important decision you could ever and will ever make!

changed. forever.

at times these lyrics just pop into my head. they so accurately express my feelings. for almost a year straight i would close my eyes at night and would think maybe i was going crazy. everyone around me certainly thought i was. after experiencing Jesus for the first time i was changed. forever. i didn't change who i was because that is what i was suppose to do to become "religious". or i didn't change who i was to be apart of the religion. and i didn't even change who i was to please God. i changed because i was in love. these past 3 years have been the most unbelievable years of my short 18 ( almost 19;) ) years of my life. when i see where I was to where Jesus has brought me in just 3 short years i'm in complete awe, and amazement. every time i begin to think i am as close to Jesus as i can get, He comes along and show me i have so much left to learn. i'm thankful He's made Himself so apparent in my life. Though everyone may still think i'm crazy, you're probably right, crazy for Jesus, & i wouldn't want it any other way!

Purpose Driven Living

Well, it is far past my bedtime at this point, but I have been taken over by my current thoughts and I needed to blog! Lately I've been completely consumed with such a crazy busy schedule that sleep is my last priority and I seem to get less and less of it as this crazy summer continues on. I'm hoping I'll be able to finish this post without falling asleep.. Bare with me if it's not my best ;)

Today I was so excited; it was FINALLY July 30th! Ever sense I had seen the first preview for Charlie St. Cloud I had wanted to see it! After a long time of convincing I persuaded my cousins from out of town to see this movie. For those of you who are unaware I am a little baby when it comes to sad movies, songs, etc. I cry for no reason at all. I had been having a pep-talk with myself all day, it went something like, "it's just a movie" and I continued to repeat this straight up until the point when we arrived there. Luckily for me we sat in the back corner of the movie theater so my crying would not bother others ;) And without fail I balled like a newborn through-out the entire movie! I have mixed emotions about this movie. I've yet to decide if I like it or hate it.

I guess I'll start with the cons. My number one reason for disliking this movie is that it was unbelievably sad from the beginning to the end. There was not a single happy moment. I'm a HUGE fan of The Blindside!! Ever sense I saw it I seem to compare every movie I see to it. So in my opinion it had big shoes to fill. That was the number 1 reason but there were also a lot of super natural events that lost me. I have a short attention span and it lost me really quick!

Enough of this though I'm not blogging to give a review on the movie. I really did enjoy the movie for the deep meaning of pursuing a purpose driven life. For those of you who have not seen the movie sorry I may spoil parts of it in the next couple sentences. Charlie the main character was driving with his little brother in the car. They were in a car accident which resulted in the death of his little brother. Charlie then becomes consumed with guilt and begins to consume his life with mourning the death of his brother. Charlie begins to live each day like it is just a day with no purpose. (the way most of us wake up and live life.. I'm guilty) Charlie then has a run-in with the paramedic who saved his life the night of his car accident. The paramedic then asks what Charlie has been up to and proceeds to say, "God doesn't just show off.. There had to be a reason He gave you a second chance." This forces Charlie to realize that this gift from God has a specific reason. I love the the thought that we are all here for specific reasons that only we can fulfill. Truly think about it...

Your life has specific meaning that you and only you can pursue. We all have such endless possibilities at our finger tips. How great God's will is :) I love the thought that God has created me to read the gospel, know the gospel, live out the gospel, share the gospel and many many more reason, etc. And then some that are just specific to myself. Though I don't know all the specific reason for my life I know that I am genuinely excited to find them out as this crazy life becomes my strive to live life purposefully! :))

-lovelovelove :))